Book Review: Turtles All The Way Down

After reading countless rave reviews about this book, I decided to read it. Written in first person by sixteen year old Aza, we see everything through her eyes. Her life is fairly standard, although she lives her every minute haunted by a mental illness. From the outset, her life doesn't seem to be unbearably difficult as she has a caring, supportive mother and a best friend, Daisy who always makes time for her, even if she has to balance work and School work around Aza. In terms of School work, Aza never seems to struggle, actively completing homework and ensuring that she talks to her mother about how she feels whether at home or elsewhere. The meetings with her therapist were interesting to read as whenever she tried to explain how she was feeling both the inner voices in her head would reply and her therapist, which added to the understanding of how she must feel having to live alongside a constant inner muttering of unnecessary thoughts at every moment. Unfortunately, her condition makes her incredibly selfish, making it hard to sympathise with her at times.

The strongest part of this book was how realistically Aza struggled to live with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder alongside severe anxiety and how this affected those closest to her. Although this was a secondary part of the plot, it was actually the most memorable thing; how her chance at dating was scuppered by her fear of germs and catching diseases; it did seem extreme but that is an honest portrayal of the Disorder. The lengths that she takes to limit germs and contact with others was difficult to read, particularly as the writing style showed her deepest, most difficult to handle thoughts. Describing her every day life, as a reader you witness her need to constantly check out articles on her phone relating to the spread of bacterial infections, how once a thought is planted into her mind the thoughts just get louder and wilder until she acts upon the irrational thoughts that demand an intense need for cleanliness and sanitiser. The little things, such as the cover of the novel representing spiraling thoughts of Aza's mind, the thoughts that she's unable to ignore, even when she wants to, really helps to demonstrate how possessive the Disorder can be.

The introduction of Davis, a childhood friend added another level to the story, alongside Daisy's relationship with Mychel; however I liked that the romance side of things didn't take over the plot. Davis and his younger brother, Noah find themselves in an uncomfortable situation that Noah in particular genuinely can't cope with; your heart breaks just by reading about his plight. Both boys are fragile, but unfortunately so is Aza and so the potential of a relationship between her and Davis seems like an impossible dream. Aza's condition make her completely and utterly self-absorbed, although unintentionally, which is why it is so easy to feel sorry for her; she adores her friends and family but her mind doesn't allow her to escape or relax. Daisy is the best friend that many people would dream of as although she can be harsh and at times cruel due to frustration at the friend she loves being so selfish, however intentionally. That said, Daisy is very supportive and does her best to understand Aza even at her worst moments, when Aza doesn't understand herself.

Overall, I found this book to be an interesting read; I have a bit of love/hate relationship with John Green's novels if I'm honest. His ideas are always excellent, although I feel like the execution could be better and that has thus far has unfortunately rang true for each of the books that I've read by the author at this point. The portrayal of living with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and extreme Anxiety was beautiful, it was definitely the strongest part of the plot, as you were also shown how others respond to mental heath too, but in this case it literally took over the majority of the book. It was great to see a average teenager living through her mental health problems, but the execution of the plot felt clumsy, there was a lot of things going on; investigations, mental health, relationships... All in all, it was a good read as it portrayed mental illness both carefully and realistically, but the other themes were a bit confusing as they all mixed in together, although that could also because the reader sees into the narrators mind and that is how she sees the world. This book had a lot of potential, the writing was good, but not outstanding. As much as it was a compelling read, it was only a 3 star as the ending didn't wow me and I just had too many questions and not enough answers, sadly.

A Book Haul #2

Hello again guys; here is another book haul (I know, it is fairly soon after I decided to post my first ever book haul, but oh well - I've genuinely bought a LOT of books recently). Over the past year or so I've been loving my kindle less, which is strange as for quite a few years I only ever read from a kindle. Now, I love to read from a book because I do like to try and limit the amount of hours that I spend staring at a screen as I do suffer from headaches quite often and quite badly. Over the past month I've found a charity sop nearby that sells an amazing variety of books for an incredible 20p each and in such good condition too. Weirdly, I found some lovely copies of classics in Homesense of all places and naturally I had to snap up a classic that I loved as a child and hated as a teenager (thank you, a level english literature...) for a decent price of £2.99. There are so many lovely titles to explore and in all honesty, it does feel like my reading list is forever growing, which as much as that is great and I love it, I do need to start reading some of the books that I buy, oops! The list of titles that I've bought this month are:

Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë

The One Plus One by Jojo Moyes

My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult

Will Grayson, Will Grayson by John Green & David Levithan

After You by Jojo Moyes

Dear Amy by Helen Callaghan

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time by Mark Haddon

The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger

In fairness, I have actually read some of these titles before (and reviewed them on this blog and goodreads too) but I do like to collect things a bit too much and books have become my latest collective obsession - on the plus side, books are reasonably affordable to buy compared to some of things that I've wanted to collect before (e.g. jewellery) especially when you shop around from places such as amazon, eBay, libraries and charity shops. I really want to join a book club, actually so we'll see how things go over the next couple of months, maybe I'll bite the bullet and join one. Let me know in the comments what you think of these kinds of posts :)

A Book Haul

Hello again guys; I’m trying to switch my blog content a little bit and keep it real, more to do with my every day life. If you’re a regular reader then you’ll know that I often post beauty hauls, so I made a decision to be true to myself and post a recent book haul. I often post book reviews on the blog, but I don’t think I’ve ever posted a book haul (I don’t know why not!) over the past few months I’ve got a bit bored of the kindle life and I’ve opted to buy physical book instead, although I did just buy Turtles All The Way Down by John Green for the bargain price of 99p on kindle daily deal! The majority of these books were books that I had been debating about buying for a while; I tend to use the Library often so I have to be very passionate about a book to take the plunge to buy it, although if it’s cheap I don’t mind, haha. On my pile of new books, three of them are hardback; which I love how they look but I hate reading them as I’m always terrified of breaking the spine (and they’re super heavy) but all of the titles are by well known, successful authors so I have high hopes for them. The other five books are paperback, which I prefer reading as they’re much lighter. As you can see by the range of titles, I like to read a bit of everything. The list of books that I’ve bought are:

Everything is Illuminated by Jonathan Safran Foer

The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion

Winter by Ali Smith

The Book of Dust by Phillip Pullman

How To Stop Time by Matt Haig

Americanah by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

The Lovely Bones by Alice Seobold

Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel García Márquez

I feel like my to be read list of books is constantly growing, which I actually find pretty scary. I mean, I do love books, but at the same time I’d like to feel like I could breathe a bit, haha. There are so many books scattered around the house and all over my bedroom that my boyfriend was complaining that I need to let a move on and finish them all, cheeky boy. This random set of books look to be super interesting and I can’t wait to make my way through them. Let me know in the comments if there are any books you would want to read - maybe we should start a little book club on my online corner of the web? :)

Book Review: Paper Towns

 

After reading The Fault In Our Stars, I had incredibly high hopes for Paper Towns. Overall the book was fairly slow, not boring but slow at times. Told from the perspective of an adolescent male, you would expect to be this fantastically gorgeous, confident young man. In reality, Q is reserved and enjoys routine in an almost extreme sense. That said, there is a stereotypical infatuation with one of the female characters. However, despite this standard male/female adolescent role play the characters are some more than that. Green has a way of making characters feel real, even if they have a specific gender role to play out. As this novel is centred around finishing school, growing up and discovering themselves. The novel feels focussed around the ideal of escapism that is so desirable to teenagers; there are a lot of stereotypical aspects to the storyline to begin with, but as you read on there are more aspects to the characters and you definitely realise that everyone is multi-faceted.

Some parts of the novel are pretty melodramatic, to say the least. I would put this down to teenage hormones flying around. That being said, I felt as though Green really reflected the mood swings that teenagers always seem to have, alongside a lot of overthinking. In short, one of the characters is incredibly self-adsorbed and does everything possible to ensure that she inadvertently ruins graduation for a whole group of teenagers. Margo is a character that's forever talked about, but one that, as a reader you never fully get the opportunity to understand. She leaves 'clues' to the main character, Q to find and attempt to solve after a mysterious disappearance. Although the disappearance was at the heart of the novel, I honestly felt like it was dragged out a lot, with a lot of teenage boy overthinking throughout. Margo was definitely made out to be some fantastically beautiful, unattainable being which ultimately emphasised how much a crush can affect someone. Margo is essentially the product of two very uninspiring parents who misunderstand creativity as rebellion, as well as having fake friends and ultimately a fake life.

Throughout the novel, you see Q mature a lot; changing from a fearful, repetitive, game playing 'geek', to a confident, spontaneous and ultimately intuitive individual. I never understood why he had such an obsession, such an dying love for Margo but I guess at eighteen that's how emotions work; alongside this, as a reader you also see his relationships with his friends develop during a short space of time, as well as how their relationships with girls develop. Hormones definitely play an avid part in growing up, as does beginning to understand sexuality and desire. Desire undeniably played a massive part throughout the novel, Q makes it clear she's been in love with Margo since they were children, only towards the end of the novel does the reader discover if those feelings are reciprocated. I have to say, I was thoroughly disappointed by the lack lustre ending; I felt as though there was so much drama, so much tension building up to that point and then it simply ended as quickly as it began.

There was so much potential in this book but it really didn't work for me, for a number of reasons. I liked each of the characters but they weren't written in depth enough for me, as a reader we only really got to know one character fully, which was Q and even then I would say there was room for more. There were many interesting ideas, but the story was generally bland, unfortunately. I would describe this book as being solely intent on the journey as opposed to the destination; the end result didn't live up to the excitement of the plans, the underlying childhood truama they experienced. From another perspective, I suppose you could say that the point of having such a lacklustre ending is that it correctly displays how adolescent feelings have a tendency to exaggerate the truth, to push the limits of authenticity. In short, Margo and Quentin were not these marvellous beings, they were simply human and learning how to grow up and I guess Green did an excellent job of showing this as his writing was fantastic as always, I just didn't love this novel as much as I'd hoped I would.

 

Book Review: The Fault In Our Stars

 

This is one of those books that you start to read with an open mind; as in, it could be awful or it could be amazing. This is because The Fault In Our Stars directly links to what is usually a completely taboo subjects across all areas of life. However, like all taboo subjects, cancer (particularly in adolescence) is something that it is important to acknowledge as it is a real situation for many people; it doesn't not exist just by ignoring it as a problem. Although this is a fictional story, there are so many parts to it that really pull on your heartstrings - be prepared to be full of tears in some chapters. I suppose that is one of the reasons I really loved this novel; because not only did it successfully tackle a difficult subject matter, Green made it feel relatable, as though you knew the characters. As a reader, you are rapidly drawn into Hazel's world, her worries, her likes and dislikes. 

There are so many ways in which this book creates a strong sense of emotion within the reader, mostly because it's story is not pushed across as being all sweet or happy, there are many sad moments and it feels very honest. To view the world from a sixteen year old cancer sufferer is not only unusual, but also difficult at times; as it's almost as though you can forgot how hard it must be for her to watch those that surround her; those who cancer spreads, or worse, who die from the disease. I like how it becomes a love story, a true love story. One where two adolescents bond over similar experiences to the point where they fulfil their 'wish' of meeting Hazel's favourite author; an author who writes a novel about childhood cancer, a parallel to what Green himself is doing. During their trip to Amsterdam, Augustus is finally honest about various things to Hazel and for a few chapters the novel seems like a regular teenage love story. However, with cancer being the distructive disease that it is, fate changes rapidly and the tears begin to fall.

Considering this story centres around such a horrible disease, much of the book is fairly uplifting with bouts of humour, banter and sarcastic remarks flying between the main characters. Although alongside this, the book is also very sensitive and handles the topic well as it also details how cancer affects not only the sufferer but also their family and friends. Throughout the book the characters do their best to remain strong and brave in an attempt to hide the worst from their parents, Hazel in particular. They also acknowledge some of the side effects of cancer such as depression are not widely known about, especially when you consider how much they have to lose; their lives, their limbs, their friends and family. It's a lonely life, one that Green somehow transfers into words and definitely raises awareness of the struggles of both illness and impending adulthood. As ultimately due to their cancer situations, they have had to grow up faster, to the point that the characters come across as more adult than adolescent the majority of the time. 

The ending is incredibly tough and not one that as a reader, you expect or are prepared for. However, I thought it was a fantastic translation of the truth of cancer. It's a disease, one that isn't fair and doesn't let go of its prisoners easily. As a reader, you are provided with a rather blunt view of the disease, to the point that Hazel even declares 'Depression is a side effect of dying.' Which is why I loved this book so much; it truly resonates with the reader the issues that come with having to deal with not only death, but the ideal way to die. Considering that death is a huge topic throughout the book, it actually isn't acknowledged often as many of the characters have a fear of death, which is hardly surprising considering their situations. The overall story was thought provoking, extensive, at some moments sad and at other moments truly enjoyable which was due to the first person writing style, as a reader you really connect on a personal level with the characters. I would completely recommend this book, but I would also suggest reading it before seeing the film adaption.